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  • Deborah A Allen

Did you miss me?


You might be wondering why the long gap between this post and my last. Well…

I’ll admit it I’ve been avoiding you… But then I’ve been avoiding people in general lately.

Some of it for your own good and some for mine.

I had the flu, and I was coughing sneezing and spluttering like a defective water boiler with none of the charm. So I didn’t feel much like speaking to anyone and giving them the gift of the evil little virus that I had been given.

My gift to myself was avoiding other people, I’ve avoided talking to them, interacting via social media and even watching them on TV.

The reason is because I just cannot cope with the horrible negative attitudes that seem to be rife the world over.

And nothing is safe, I’ve been focusing on walking my dog and taking pictures of him trying to see the positives of life but even then someone had to be nasty. I didn’t ask for an opinion, I just posted a nice photo of him playing with his new ball but someone felt the need to comment that (in their opinion) ‘ he doesn’t look ‘right’ he is barrel chested, has turned out legs and the wrong shaped head’.

Why? Why was it necessary to criticize a photo of an innocent dog enjoying a moment playing with his new ball? Was it simply because the opportunity presented itself to ruin a joyful moment?

How sad and petty is that?

It’s all too depressing, and I don’t just mean about people being nasty to my dog ! In the U.K and Europe the ongoing subject is Brexit. Everyone has an opinion and expects everyone else to have an opinion which in a perfect world would be the same as their own and there’s hell to pay if it isn’t. Hands up if you’re sick of it…

Perfectly sane and reasonable people turn into monsters every time its mentioned, expressing theories ranging from it all being a plot by the Germans to take control of Europe, to it being a plot by far right activists to take control of the UK and everything in between.

This week alone I’ve been stopped by a man I barely know while walking my dog and asked what I think of it and today while having physio my therapist also asked what I thought of it all..

Regardless of what I think or you think one thing is sure, Brexit has caused and given rise to so many lies and so much hatred that the sooner the word is confined to the archives the better.

A wise man once said ‘never discuss politics and religion at the dinner table’.. I’m sure he knew it would only cause indigestion but one thing is certain, whoever he was, he was right and not only about the dinner table because no matter where or when these subjects are bought up arguments follow.

Religion is another cause of terrible rows and arguments and the little hate worms of gossip and sly inuendo that sneak around disguised as ‘jokes’ or news stories are the root of so much awful hatred that seem impossible to stamp out once they've taken hold.

It’s disgraceful to label entire groups of people as murderers or terrorists simply because of their ethnicity or religious belief and yet that’s what these horrible little hate worms do. Disguised as news or as jokes and shared via social media, in apps or just via gossip in the pub they wriggle their way into our sub conscious and twist our thoughts until we cant see straight and the more we look the more hate we find.

We need to focus our thoughts and attention on truth and positive images because if we don’t the haters will rot your brain.

I’m not saying everyone is nice or honest far from it, but look at a field and you will see grass.. Look closer, focus on a flower then look closer still and you start to notice more and more flowers until soon you see hundreds of them.

But if you stop and focus on a single piece of rubbish, suddenly you will see two, three, ten, a hundred and soon all you can see is rubbish. This is how haters work, they make you focus on the negative until you can’t see the flowers because they are smothered by the rubbish.

My mother always used to say ‘if you cant say something nice , say nothing’ and I think that advice should be well remembered and liberally put into practice when reading or sharing news, jokes or any other media content that contains hate or the seeds of hate.

Be aware that the news story or joke you share or pass on now could be the catalyst that changes someone’s outlook on a whole group of people.

Chose instead to pass on positive thoughts, positive stories and seeds of hope.

We are all are responsible for the future and we can all help decide if it will be filled with truth and hope or lies and fear.


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